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Dating & Friends
	Dating Violence No one deserves to be abused. There are ways you can help yourself stop the violence, whether you’re being abused or you’re abusing someone else. If you need help, call 1-800-LifeNet and talk to someone. All calls are confidential. > See Nicole's story > Downloads & activities > Teen Dating Violence: Get the Facts (PDF) > If Your Friend is Being Abused by Someone Else (PDF) > Abuse in Dating & Why People Stay in Those Relationships (PDF)


	If you are being abused It is not your fault and help is available. If you are in danger now or are hurt, call 911. Talk to a friend. If you haven’t already told a friend about what’s happening in your relationship, try it. Ask your friend to listen without trying to solve the problem for you.. Try taking a break. If you’re not happy with the way you’re being treated, but you’re not sure what to do, consider taking some time away from your boyfriend or girlfriend to think about it. Consider talking to an adult. If you feel your situation is too big to handle alone, it may help to find an adult you trust. If it isn’t a parent try a teacher, the parent of a friend, or even a school counselor. If you don’t feel safe, try not to be alone with your boyfriend/girlfriend. If you feel scared when you’re alone together, try to avoid it. Spend time in groups and in public as much as possible.


	If your friend is being abused Talking with a friend in an abusive relationship can make a big difference. Sometimes, it can be difficult to know what to say or how to say it, especially if you’ve never dealt with this issue before. Things you can do: Listen first to what your friend has to say. Talk to your friend in private and keep whatever he or she says confidential. Let your friend know why you are concerned. Be specific. Refer to incidents you have personally witnessed instead of what you have heard from others. Offer to get your friend information about help resources. Mention other people your friend might talk to - a school counselor, a teacher, or another adult your friend trusts. Let your friend know you are available to talk more if he/she needs it. Give your friend the National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline or LifeNet contact information. Things you should not do: Be judgmental. Make your friend feel stupid or ashamed. Ask lots of yes or no questions. Instead, give your friend a chance to talk freely. Force your friend to make a decision or give ultimatums. Your friend has to decide when he/ she is ready to get help or end the relationship. You can’t do it for your friend.


	More Resources GET & GIVE HELP AND INFORMATION National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline (1-866-331-9474 or 1-866-331-8453 [TTY]) - National 24-hour resource by phone or online, specifically designed for teens and young adults with real-time one-on-one support from trained Peer (Teen) Advocates. How to identify teen dating violence (PDF) What to do: (PDF) If you are being abused by someone else/If you are abusing someone else Help a friend: (PDF) If your friend is being abused by someone else/If your friend is abusing someone else Reach out to Day One, a New York City organizations devoted to the issue of teen dating violence. Resource List (PDF) for Adolescent Victims of Domestic Violence and Dating Violence Learn more about Teen Dating Violence, including: Information Guide What can friends do? How you can help: What can schools do? How you can help: What can men/boys do? TAKE ACTION See It and Stop It Campaign - This site was created by teens in Massachusetts to help other teens identify teen dating violence, help victims and abusers get help, and take action to end teen relationship violence. The New York City Mayor’s Office to Combat Domestic Violence offers several youth-focused programs including the NYC Healthy Relationship Training Academy and the Adopt-A-School/Relationship Abuse Prevention Program.







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